There are times when ambition and what you may think is your destiny ( what you should do ) come into conflict with that thing called reality
Without knowing it fully I have always had a love for performing and acting and when I left school that desire for performing eventually … after many years .. led me to go to drama school
For the last 9 months I have not had a job and so that thing called ‘ reality ‘ reared its ugly head and I am finding I am having to make choices that sit very uncomfortably with me..
After several interviews it looks like one of the jobs I have applied for will happen but along with that comes that nasty place of heading down a path I don’t want to go as it may result in ‘giving up ‘ acting
I still feel I have so much to give in the profession but not given the chance to. The game has changed over the years and it is increasingly hard for new people to get into .. unless you are a reality tv star , an instagram icon or just become a news item because you refuse to wear high heels at work .. ( yes she has been offered a role in Corrie !!! ). If you are a working actor it is very very hard to crack
So choices are now starting to come into the equation and choices I knew I would have to make at some point although my ‘gut’ feeling is to carry on acting … if I can balance both like before I would be in a win win situation but that is hard to do
I wish I was someone who could just focus on an IT career but I know i will always have that ‘acting thing ‘ poking me in the ribs and maybe for now it needs to be parked but when you have this ‘ gut ‘ feeling nagging at you it can be hard to focus on another career