Sat in a restaurant looking out on the town I was brought up in … I would rather be here for a happier reason… but today is not the case… today I attend the funeral of a friend of over 30 years , a loving , kind , selfless person which there is no other who was taken far too young 

While I dread what the day will hold with moments of tears and sadness I am trying to find the strength to take it in and take on the words that Pete gave me before he died … ‘ don’t be angry ‘ …. I had an outburst of anger on Facebook when I found out his situation and quite out of character said some strong words… when we were alone at the hospice he told me off for saying it… so today I am going to try to ‘ not be angry ‘ but celebrate his life. All the good times we had and all the experiences we shared , the laughs , the tears , the disagreements and all the beer

It is tough being back in this town as it also holds so many memories of my mum and dad and brother who are sadly not with us anymore and every road and place holds a memory

I have not been able to come back to this town for years since my mum passed and didn’t want a reason to come back as there are so many raw memories but , today , it was right , it’s right to be here for Pete , and for me to eventually face my demons about this place and my family home

I am not posting this on the day as I don’t feel it’s right so double posting today 

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